When the ancient Romans invented concrete, they used it to build temples to the Gods. What would they make of Fuengirola? What Gods inspired the Spanish builders to create such ahem, wonders, our Roman might think. As tour locations go, it might have been designed by Baccus himself.
We started off, for a bit of novelty, going via Southend airport. I recommend it. I was first through security. I don't mean just of the touring party, I mean we were the only people in the airport. Quite a novelty to have zero queue for anything at an airport. James Earl wasted no time and ordered 2 breakfasts with extra hash browns. Seemed excessive to me, props are a different breed.
Our Easyjet flight ended up full - the rest of the passengers were sensible enough to arrive after 4:30am - we were just over eager because we love tour. That first day, I was drinking continuously for 24 full hours. From airport opening to nightclub closing (a couple of power-naps notwithstanding). After the airport and the plane, we met up with the rest of the touring party who, being extra keen, had come out a day early to play golf. They were by the pool by the side of our very own concrete monolith. It was very pleasant indeed - if you like burning hot astro (more on that later). Kev tried to order a cheese sandwich and instead started an international incident. It was time to move on. After exploring the town a bit, we settled into our favourite kind of bar - yes an Irish bar.
The next morning, feeling a little dusty, I tried desperately to drown my nausea and dehydration as we took a bus to Club Rugby Victoriano - which was another slice of extremely hot astroturf in the middle of an absolutely stunning nature reserve. They did have a pretty decent balcony too. Love a balcony. Todays rugby was to be a tournament, and it started with our hosts vs Border Park RFC from Northumbria. Border Park are a touring side - they don't trouble themselves with leagues or cups - they focus on touring. What a great idea. They won convincingly.
We were next up against Calgary Saracens for a 40 min game. Yes, that Calgary. Disgracefully, they apparently had enforced a 2 drink limit the night before. We were thusly handicapped, but actually the game was a corker. Physical, attritional. Just before the half, the stalemate was broken, after a turnover by yours truly Chad ran 90 meters before being hauled down. Tom Saunders had the stones to finish and we ended the half 7-0.
In the 2nd half we pulled away somewhat, with tries from Will Knowlden and Rich Goodman, we won 21-0.
The next match was Victorano vs Calgary for a 3rd place play-off, which Calgary won. After our mutual exertions in the blistering heat nobody really wanted to play much more - so we settled on a 20 minute game to decide 1st place vs Border Park. They scored early on, but we couldn't convert a couple of golden chances. I feel like if we'd played the full 40 we would have won, but as it was we lost 5-0. Will Knowlden was awarded Player of the Tournament. Is there anything he can't do? Based on what I saw from tour the answer is that he cannot lose.
After celebrating with our hosts and the other opposition and after eating an excellent paella and some empanada, and drinking a wheelie bin full of beer we headed back into Fuengirola. Chad got a bit spicy with the first time tourists, and Charlie got a bit aggressive.
The next day was a rather leisurely affair, as we had the late flight home. After a long delay on the tarmac, we arrived back to a typically deserted Southend and headed finally home - another great tour in the bank.
Thank you to Jason, Liam, Paddy and Max for organising this tour, and roll on the next.
